Write for God

There’s a certain xenophobic cable news commentator who insists on making immigration a dirty word. People who come to our nation with their families to work are “illegals,” as if they were bootleg hooch in Al Capone’s day. When governments translate documents or offer services in Spanish, they’re just encouraging “illegals” not to learn English. (Although this blowhard vents about Latinos without exception, I found it cute when, in honor of St. Patrick’s Day last year, he did a piece on Irish nationals who overstay their visas. I can’t wait for his Bastille Day report on all those French folks who made it past our “broken borders,” as he says ad nauseam.)

Why don’t they all just learn English? As someone whose first language wasn’t English, I would like to tell Mr. Shrinking Middle Class why that isn’t as easy as he thinks: this is an extremely difficult language to master. My sister and I were nine and six when we started learning our new language and, about a year later, we were fluent enough not to get laughed at in class. My parents, who were in their 30s, still have heavy accents and think in Spanish before they speak English.

The most difficult aspect of learning English isn’t the syntax, although that’s certainly backward if your first language was Spanish, as mine was. Say “old book” and the adjective precedes the noun; say “libro viejo” and it’s the other way around. Only someone writing airy poetry in Spanish would reverse them for effect.

The conglomeration of words from Old English and other languages isn’t what makes this language difficult to learn, either. Learn the words and it eventually doesn’t matter where they came from. English can be very economical. Even if you’re not bilingual, check out the instructions on the next piece of furniture you put together. The instructions in English are always shorter and more direct than in French, Spanish, German or any other European language.

What makes English a devil to learn, Mr. Cable News Know-it-all, is the pronounciation. Nothing makes sense in English. A person can be well read and sound like an idiot if he tries to read aloud in English. (Notice how the same word in this sentence, “read,” looks exactly the same, but sounds different each time. Pity the poor immigrant!)

In Spanish or Italian, two languages I speak or can muddle my way through, words are phonetic. Anyone with a basic reading knowledge can combine consonants and vowels in the same way. An a always sounds like what we would pronounce as “ah.” There’s never a long a or a short a; it is what it is.

Today, my daughter who is first in her class and reads constantly, had a heck of a time helping me cook tortellini. She was scanning the list of Italian seasonings and couldn’t tell if “herb” had a silent h or not. I had to tell her that a silent h is a fragrant seasoning and a h that’s not is the name of the Mr. Alpert, the great trumpet player from the Tijuana Brass. Another herb, “basil,” sounds different if it’s a male name or if its added to pasta. That’s English for you, and that’s why it’s so darn hard to learn.

Why does “read” mean the present and the past of the verb “to read,” but they’re pronounced differently? It’s the same with “lead” when one way of saying it means what’s not in gasoline anymore and what you do instead of follow. To those who’ve learned to read phonetically, it’s baffling.

I’m always amazed at spelling bees and the children who manage to win contests that test them on the endlessly wacky ways that letters can be combined in English. In Spanish, every kid would win every spelling bee; with extremely rare exceptions, everything is spelled the way it’s written. (A notable exception is the word “reloj,” which means clock or watch. The j is silent and only God knows why it’s there. Everything else is a breeze.)

It’s for sure that the average “illegal” would have a much more difficult time learning English than Monsieur Cable Hot Air would have learning Spanish. It doesn’t deter our least favorite commentator that some of the Mexican and Central American workers without visas have had to learn Spanish in their own countries. For some, native languages that were in our continent long before Columbus happened to land here were their first means of expression. (I never say Columbus “discovered” us because the only thing he found was a way to lead the charge of those who began the exploitation of native people on our shores. Come to think of it, the Genoan sailor and his Spanish crew arrived here needing translation assistance.)

When I was in high school, I used to tutor students in Italian, a language I learned in school and which I still love. I also assisted Spanish-speaking students who were in the process of learning English. I know how difficult it is to learn the intricacies of a language that’s not your first. A young girl whose first language had been a native Central American dialect couldn’t pronounce the word “fish,” a common enough term for us. The “sh” phoneme was impossible for her, and she was an eager student who was motivated to learn. My Italian student had learned certain words from his immigrant grandmother and the word for beans, “fagioli,” was beyond his understanding. His Nonna made “pasta fazool,” he said. She never pronounced it “fagioli.”

I love languages and the sound of Spanish, Italian, French and Portuguese is incredibly beautiful spoken and sung. Who can resist Andrea Boccelli, Edith Piaf, Alejandro Fernandez or Caetano Veloso singing a ballad? These languages sound like silk and cream to the ear. English can be just as de-lovely, or am I the only person delighted by Cole Porter’s lyrics and Gerard Manley Hopkins’ lyrical language? English is a diverse, musical language, but it’s difficult to learn and difficult to pronounce without sounding confused.

For every “illegal” that doesn’t want to learn English, according to cable’s favorite immigration nazi, there’s the child of an “illegal” that is picking it up within a year and making it his or her own. Research continues to show that, by the second generation, English has replaced the native language the immigrant brought to our nation. Those who keep their first language make a conscious effort to do so. For the young, English is the language of choice among themselves and, eventually, with the rest of the world. My children have studied Spanish in school and can understand some words and expressions, but they think and speak English only.

English is the world’s language, but it’s difficult to master for those who are new to it. Language stylists such as Vladimir Nabokov and Joseph Conrad who had other first languages, are all the more skilled as authors. For every adult immigrant that needs language assistance, there’s a child who is picking English up as his or her means of expression. I love being bilingual and I can find beauty in either Spanish or English. One is the language of the past and the other is the language of the future.